Did I read that sign right?

I got this list in an email. I don’t know the origin, but surely good for a few laughs. –t.h.g.
 
Did I read that sign right?
TOILET OUT OF ORDER. PLEASE USE FLOOR BELOW
In a Laundromat:
AUTOMATIC WASHING MACHINES: PLEASE REMOVE ALL YOUR CLOTHES WHEN THE LIGHT GOES OUT

In a London department store:
BARGAIN BASEMENT UPSTAIRS

In an office:
WOULD THE PERSON WHO TOOK THE STEP LADDER YESTERDAY PLEASE BRING IT BACK OR FURTHER STEPS WILL BE TAKEN

In an Office:
AFTER TEA BREAK STAFF SHOULD EMPTY THE TEAPOT AND STAND UPSIDE DOWN ON THE DRAINING BOARD

Outside a second hand shop:
WE EXCHANGE ANYTHING – BICYCLES, WASHING MACHINES, ETC. WHY NOT BRING YOUR WIFE ALONG AND GET A WONDERFUL BARGAIN?

Notice in health food shop window:
CLOSED DUE TO ILLNESS

Spotted in a safari park:(I sure hope so)
ELEPHANTS PLEASE STAY IN YOUR CAR

Seen during a conference:
FOR ANYONE WHO HAS CHILDREN AND DOESN’T KNOW IT, THERE IS A DAY CARE ON THE 1ST FLOOR

Notice in a farmer’s field:
THE FARMER ALLOWS WALKERS TO CROSS THE FIELD FOR FREE, BUT THE BULL CHARGES.

Message on a leaflet:
IF YOU CANNOT READ, THIS LEAFLET WILL TELL YOU HOW TO GET LESSONS

On a repair shop door:
WE CAN REPAIR ANYTHING. (PLEASE KNOCK HARD – THE BELL DOESN’T WORK)

Proofreading is a dying art, wouldn’t you say?

Man Kills Self Before Shooting Wife and Daughter
This one I caught in the SGV Tribune the other day and called the Editorial Room and asked who wrote this. It took two or three readings before the editor realized that what he was reading was impossible!!! They put in a correction the next day.

Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says
Really?
Ya think?
—————————————————————————-
Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers
Now that’s taking things a bit far!
———————————————————–
Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over
What a guy!
—————————————————————
Miners Refuse to Work after Death
Good-for-nothing’ lazy so-and-so’s!
——————————————————
Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant
See if that works any better than a fair trial!
———————————————————-
War Dims Hope for Peace
I can see where it might have that effect!
—————————————————————-
If Strike Isn’t Settled Quickly, It May Last Awhile
Ya think?!
———————————————————————–
Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures
Who would have thought!
—————————————————————-
Enfield (London ) Couple Slain; Police Suspect Homicide
They may be onto something!
————————————————————————
Red Tape Holds Up New Bridges
You mean there’s something stronger than duct tape?
———————————————————-
Man Struck By Lightning Faces Battery Charge
He probably IS the battery charge!
———————————————-
New Study of Obesity Looks for Larger Test Group
Weren’t they fat enough?!
———————————————–
Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft
That’s what he gets for eating those beans!
———————————
Kids Make Nutritious Snacks
Do they taste like chicken?
****************************************
Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half
Chainsaw Massacre all over again!
***************************************************
Hospitals are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors
Boy, are they tall!
*******************************************
And the winner is….
Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead
Did I read that right?
***************************************************
Now that you’ve smiled at least once, it’s your turn to spread the
stupidity and send this to someone you want to bring a smile to
…(maybe even a chuckle).
We all need a good laugh, at least once a day!

Online collaboration tools for effective Virtual Communities

I am continually searching for tools and new technologies that I can use to build virtual communities and to more effectively collaborate with colleagues in diverse locations. While email is still a useful tool for communicating, it’s functionality is quite limited. I’ve done a little bit of research to try to discover tools that can extend the range of functions available to me and enable closer more productive working relationships with people in my far-flung networks. Here are some of the results that I have gleaned from various sources.

I have, for some time, been using Skype, Dropbox, and Google Docs, but have not yet tried some others that appear below.

I am eager to have readers contribute by providing comments and suggestions of their favorite tools.

Checklist of Features

  • Action Planning
  • Brainstorming
  • Contact Management
  • Content Management
  • Discussion Board
  • Document Management
  • Email Integration
  • Group Calendars
  • Instant Messaging
  • Project Management
  • Task Management
  • User Access Controls
  • Version Control

_______________________________________________________________________

6 Free Easy-to-Use Online Collaboration Tools – Make Teamwork Simple

From Trendblog: http://trendblog.net/6-easy-to-use-online-collaboration-tools-make-teamwork-simple/

Dropbox

Dropbox is probably one tool that we use most for collaboration. With this little software, we are able to have access to all our documents, files, articles and everything else.

As we are all tech junkies, we own quite a few pieces of technology, including multiple notebooks, tablets and smartphones. And we can access our files from each gadget we own. Dropbox is compatible with all popular computer- and mobile platforms. There are native apps built for Windows, Mac, Ubuntu, Android, iOS and Blackberry. Also, you can access your Dropbox from the internet browser. Check out the Dropbox system requirements.

If you aren’t using Dropbox for teamwork, you should definitely consider doing it immediately. This tool allows you to create so-called “shared folders“, which will appear in every team member’s computer. Any file, which has been uploaded to those folders, can be accessed by every person with access to it.

Make sure to check out our post about unusual ways to use Dropbox and how to get more Dropbox space for free!

Dropbox is a must-have for everyone. Seriously.

Screenhero is one of the best tools for screen-sharing&  voice chat collaboration.

For instance, if you are working on some kind presentation or any other document, you can simply share your screen with your team and work together on your screen. With Screenhero, all participants will have their own cursor on your screen and will be able to edit documents.

Skype

If you happen to be in the same situation as us, Skype is probably an application, which you never close. For me it is the most used application on my computer.

All internal communication within the trendblog.net team happens via Skype, either through IM Messaging or video-calls. In spite of being separated by at least 1.500 miles (2.500 km) from each other it seems like we are sitting together in one office.

Google Docs

Sometimes we need to work on one document together at the same time. With Google Docs you can do that very easily; This tool allows you to create online documents, presentations and spreadsheets. You don’t even need to have any office software installed – everything happens right in your browser or via the mobile app for iOS and Android.

Just create a document and share the link with other people. Now you can edit the document together at the same time in live-mode.

Google Hangouts

With Skype you can only video-chat with 2 people for free. And that’s the reason why we sometimes use Google Hangouts. This tool allows you to have a video-conference with up to 100 people for free.

The new Google Hangouts are great to keep all your communication in one place and synchronized. For the sake of testing the new Hangouts we have ditched all other online communication tools. Make sure to check out our review.

Trello

Over the last few months we have tested pretty much every free team/project collaboration tool out there, including popular ones like Asana and Podio. After trying them we didn’t really feel that these tools were making our lives easier. Instead, managing our projects has become a complicated chore.

But there is one tool out there which is different. Trello uses a card-based system for keeping your project overview as simple as possible. You can create custom columns like “To-Do” or “In Progress” which you will use to organize individual tasks. The tasks will be then added as a small card to the column. For each card you can set a due date, write comments, assign people to it and many more.

Asana, Podio and alike are made for managers. Trello is made for people.

One especially great thing about Trello is the user experience. The interface is very simple to use. For example, you can drag every card from column to column (i.e. after completing a task) and assign people to the card by dragging their profile picture onto the card.

Also, Trello probably has the best mobile and tablet collaboration app out there. The experience is exactly what you would expect from an app, with many features taken from the system it runs on. For example, you can delete tasks on your iPad by swiping them to the left, which will reveal a red “delete” button. This looks very much like the native iOS deleting feature. All of these combined make sure that your learning curve is as smooth as possible and you won’t get a headache while using it.

Check out the video below for a demonstration of how Trello works.

Comments

I will also add http://www.binfire.com which combines most features the above six apps have in one package.

Great list and as owner of a start-up, I would recommend Dooster. It takes care of all my virtual collaboration needs. Check them out www.dooster.net

Thanks for the detailed post . I would like to add iCoordinator Free. You can add read more and register it here. http://www.icoordinator.com/bl…

Also have a look at www.proofhub.com/. It is a great online collaboration and project management tool that makes handling work easier, faster and better.

These are some good tools. But we use Drum (http://thisisdrum.com/) which combines all of the collaboration tools into one easy to use (WebRTC) browser based tool with no downloads. At the moment they allow you to use it for free which is an added bonus!

Thanks for the list. I agree with the usefulness of most of the tools you listed excepted for Trello. Trello is fine but I think it lacks a note taking feature. For people having many meetings like most of white-collar professionals, a good note-taking feature is a must-have. This is why I prefer using Beesy (http://www.beesapps.com/beesy-… ). me, that has a dynamic note-takign feature from which all the To-dos, calendar, project management feature are updated and managed. More generally, I think all-in-one apps like Beesy are the best tools if you want to get more productive.

Some great tools there Daniel! We have been using a tool called Drum (http://thisisdrum.com/) here at CIM with a couple of the additional ones up there. Dropbox has been a good place for us to centrally store reports etc. However we use Drum to host our web meetings and collaborate on documents. There hasn’t been any need to download anything and everyone can join. Its also free which has been an added bonus for our budget!

Just a couple of tools, which we use in our team:

Evernote for knowledge sharing.
https://www.box.com/ instead of Dropbox
http://casual.pm/ instead of trello.

I will also add http://www.binfire.com which combines most features the above six apps have in one package.

Get “vegucated”

I recently had occasion to view the documentary film, Vegucated. I’ve followed a mostly vegetarian diet for several decades but still this film taught me a few things and provided a reminder of a some others that I had forgotten. It did this in a way that was often amusing,  sometimes poignant, and occasionally shocking.

Here’s a  synopsis of the film from the official website:

 Here is a trailer for the film:

Jon Stewart’s bodacios commentary on US policy on ISIL and the Middle East

Jon Stewart is always good for a few laughs. Like court jesters of old, he has a delightful way of critiquing the actions of the power structure. Watch this:

Your food and your safety, health risks of the industrial food system

There is very little that I buy from major supermarket chains, and when I do buy something, I’m careful to read the labels. As a general rule, I avoid anything that contains artificial colorings, flavorings, or preservatives. The giant food corporations want us to believe that everything the put into their products is safe, but the overwhelming weight of evidence tells me otherwise.

There are many websites where you can easily find credible information about specific additives. One that I have recently discovered that goes into other health issues, as well, is Nutrition Facts by Dr. Michael Greger M.D.

Here is a short video on the commonly used preservative, sodium benzoate.

Ukrainian Enemies Met: Guitars, Music, Poetry and Agreements

Sharon Tennison sends out a newsletter periodically. In a recent edition, she told of a remarkable meeting between combatants on the two sided of the Ukrainian conflict. Here it is in its entirety.-t,h,g,

Friends, something heartwarming happened in the last few days on the battleground of Novorussia (SE Ukraine). Two Ukrainian enemy camps (Kiev Ukrainian forces and the SEastern Ukraine forces)––enemies until they met––had a meeting that included guitars, singing and reciting poetry, plus some common goals agreed upon.  The power of people-to-people exchanges even between enemies is validated once again!   Please note the [  ] brackets where I have inserted a word or two to make the designations easier to understand or remember. Please share this “good news” story with your friends and colleagues.   Sharon

The following report came Wednesday, October 29, 2014

Something very, very interesting has happened in Novorussia (SE Ukraine)

Something fantastically interesting has happened in Novorussia: two senior Novorussian commanders, Igor Bezler and Alexei Mozgovoi have attempted to communicate with Ukrainian [Kievans] military who are on the other side.

This apparently began when [SE Ukraine Novorussian Commander] Igor Bezler agreed to be interviewed by three TV crews at the same time: a Russian crew, a Novorussian crew, and a Ukrainian crew.  The big news here was, of course, that a Ukrainian journalist was given access to the city of Gorlovka, currently surrounded by Ukrainian forces, and that she [note a woman!] got to speak with the local people, including combatants and then that she was given access to Bezler himself.   Since all the journalists were more or less openly accusing each other of “filtering the truth” all parties agreed that the full recording, unedited, would be made available on YouTube.  Now please keep in mind that in Banderastan [what SE Ukrainians call the Kievans in West Ukraine whom they see as primarily pro-Nazis] are blacklisted, Russian journalists are blacklisted, Russian TV stations banned, and that the people in the junta [in their terms the illegal government of Poroshenko] controlling  Ukraine are told that the other side are terrorists and Russian soldiers.  Oh, and the Kiev Ukrainian media is the most disgusting, sold out, subservient, propagandistic you can imagine.  And then suddenly, at least one Ukrainian TV crew agrees to show the face of one of the most feared Novorussian commanders (SE Ukrainian) and he get’s to speak his mind.

But the next event was even more amazing.  [SE Ukrainian Commander Alexei Mozgovoi agreed to a videoconference with not only Ukrainian journalists, but with actual field commanders of the [West Ukraine or Kiev] Ukrainian military.  To see Mozgovoi and the [Kiev] Ukrainians speak directly to each other was absolutely amazing.  And here I have to apologize.  I will not ask our translators to translate and subtitle the full happenings.  First, there were not one, but two such videoconferences.  Then, we are talking about three long videos, see for yourself:

Bezler interview: Published on Oct 21, 2014

http://youtu.be/uVN2wkuL88w (length: 2 hours 17 min)

First videoconference of Mozgovoi: Published on Oct 22, 2014

http://youtu.be/WYy5Y9MQozA (length: 1 hour 20 mins)

Second videoconference of Mozgovoi: Published Oct 28, 2014

http://youtu.be/tC7YGe0SmqQ (length:1 hour 51 mins)

I do hope that somebody somewhere will translate it all, but this is way too big a load for me to ask any of our volunteers.

Also, these are very complex videos.  There are discussions, some short moments of yelling and interrupting, there is cross-talk and there are even two songs.  This is complex, very emotional stuff, very hard to convey in a translated text.  Besides, who will have the time to sit through it all?

No, what I propose is to share with you the elements which struck me so much.

But first I need to clarify an important point: while the original idea apparently had been to have combatants talking to combatants, the Ukrainian side only had a few commanders and a few activists.  The Novorussian side was composed of actual soldiers.  Apparently, the Ukrainian side did not feel comfortable putting their foot-soldiers on the spot.

First and foremost, it was amazing to see how much both sides fully agreed upon.  Both sides agreed that this war was useless and only benefited the enemies of the Ukraine.  Both sides expressed contempt, disgust and even hatred for the politicians in power and the oligarchs who rule over Banderastan today.   Both sides also agree that Yanukovich [Ukraine’s former president] was a scumbag,  and that the earlier Maidan protests were absolutely legitimate,  but that the original protests had been hijacked by enemies of the Ukraine [the Nazi elements].  Both sides also agreed that this war had to be stopped.  Now, please keep in mind that Ukrainian Nazis were, of course, not invited.  These were mainly regular Ukrainian military speaking to Novorussian military and Ukrainian activists speaking to Mozgovoi.   There were also some real disagreements.

The Ukrainian [Kiev] position was this (paraphrase – not real quote): “the Maidan protests were legitimate and correct but you – the Novorussians – took up arms and you thereby created a crisis which the illegitimate junta used and which prevented us from defending our political goals.  We don’t want our country to further break up and what you are doing is exactly that.  Also, we know that the Russian “Polite Armed Men in Green” are fighting on your side and many of you are not representing true Ukrainian interests, but Russian interests.  Stop fighting and join the political process to clean our country from the crazies“.

To which Mozgovoi replied (paraphrase – not real quote): “we did not choose to fight, you came to our land and you are killing our people.  If you really want to clean Kiev from the Nazi scum, then don’t stand between us and Kiev and let us pass – we will take care of them,  no problem.  You are taking orders from Nazis and oligarchs and you are doing nothing to stop them from killing our people.  If we were to lay down our arms, we would all be massacred.

One interesting thing was that when the Ukrainians accused the Novorussians of doing Russia’s bidding, Mozgovoi replied that the Ukrainians were pawns of the CIA and, amazingly, the Ukrainians pretty much agreed that the CIA was running the show.  As for Mozgovoi, he did not deny that Russia was helping.

Both sides were expressing frustration that they could not unite their forces and jointly get rid of the oligarchs and the Nazis.

During the [Commander from Novorussia-no doubt ethnic Russian] Bezler interview, there was one amazing moment was when the Ukrainian crew asked Bezler if he spoke Ukrainian, to which he replied that ‘yes’.  Unconvinced, the Ukrainian crew asked him if he could recite a poem by Ukraine’s famous poet Taras Shevchenko [which every Ukrainian would know at least one].  Then, to everybody’s surprise, Bezler recited the poem “To the Poles” in which Sevchenko describes how happy the Cossaks were,

Until in the name of Christ

The ксьондзи (Latin Priests) came and set afire

To our quiet paradise. And spilled

A huge sea of tears and blood,

And killed and crucified orphans

In the Name of Christ

The heads of Cossacks then dropped

Like trampled grass,

The Ukraine cried, and moaned!

And the head after head

Fell to the ground. As if enraged,

A priest furious tongue

Screamed: «Te Deum! Hallelujah! .. “

And this is how my Polish friend and brother!

Evil priests and rich men

Separated us from each other

When we could have lived together happy

[nb: this is my own translation, I could not find this poem in English anywhere; as any Russian, I mostly understand Ukrainian, but I can easily misunderstand a word or expression so, caveat emptor, and don’t take this translation to the bank!  The Saker]

It was quite amazing to see how well Bezler spoke Ukrainian and how he used this opportunity to remind his Ukrainian counterparts how already in the past they were used and manipulated by Russia and Orthodoxy-hating Westerners, and he did so using verses of their own national hero!

In another rather surreal moment, a Novorussian solider took out a guitar and sang a song about the war.  The Ukrainians were clearly moved, although they were also disturbed by the fact that the song repeatedly said that these were “Russians fighting Russians”.  This issue came up several again later in the conversation.  From the Novorussian point of view, the Ukrainians were also part of the “Russian cultural realm” (as opposed to state or nationality) albeit with a different accent and a different history.  The Ukrainians insisted that they were a different nationality, albeit one with strong ties to the “Russian cultural realm”.

During both the Bezler and Mozgovoi interviews the issue of prisoners was raised.  Both sides reported that their men were mistreated and even tortured while in captivity.  Interestingly, during the Bezler interview there were two [Kiev] Ukrainian officials present, one human rights activist and another who was representing the Ukrainian Ministry of Defense for the topic of POWs.  They both readily admitted that Bezler treated the Ukrainian prisoners not as prisoners at all, but as guests: they were free to walk around, they ate and slept with Bezler’s men, they were treated with kindness and hospitality. In one instance he even fed them red caviar!  But the very same Bezler openly admitted that “we take no prisoners from the Nazi death squads” confirming  what I have said many times: the Russian kindness and generosity towards Ukrainian POWs only extends to regular army units – captured death squad members are immediately executed.

There are hundred of small moments and exchanges which I wish I could convey to you, but that would take too much space and time.  What I will say is that it was quite amazing to see enemies talking to each other in a very friendly manner.  I was also amazed at how readily the Ukrainians agreed that the Ukraine must rid herself from the Nazis and the oligarchs.  In various occasions people on both sides said “let’s do that together!”.  Others were more dubious.  Frankly, I am extremely impressed by the courage and decency of many of the Ukrainians in these interviews who, while standing their ground on the issue of the territorial integrity of the Ukraine, quite openly said how much they hated the Nazis and the oligarchs.  I sure hope that God will protect these men for their courage.

Both Bezler and Mozgovoi looked very, very good.  The latter especially surprised me by explicitly stating that his goal was regime change in Kiev and not just the separation of Novorussia which he clearly sees as a only temporary solution and as a necessary self-defense measure.  Clearly, both Bezler and Mozgovoi are first and foremost anti-Nazis and both of them see that there is not “Novorussian solution”.  Mozgovoi explicitly stated that he think that both sides could live together if the Ukrainians got rid of their Nazis and oligarchs.

While I have always said that the only possible stable solution of the crisis is a de-nazification of the Ukraine and a conversion of the current Banderastan into a “mentally sane” Ukraine, I am not naive and I also see that this might take a decade or more.  However, seeing how Mozgovoi and his Ukrainian counterparts agreed on the need to de-nazify and de-oligarchise (is that English?) I see that there is hope because the bottom line is this: both sides have much more in common than what separates them!

Again, these were regular Ukrainians, not crazed Nazi death-squad members, I understand that.  And the two sides do disagree on fundamental issues.  I see that too.  But I also see that there is a basis, a minimum in common, to negotiate.  This does not have to be a war of extermination.

The Ukraine as we knew her is dead.  Now we have Crimea and Novorussia which are gone forever, and a rump-Ukraine I call “Banderastan” which is occupied by the US CIA, Ukie Nazis and oligarchs.  My hope is that the just as the Ukrainian civil war turned into a war for the self-determination and liberation of Novorussia, so will the war for self-determination and liberation of Novorussia turn into a war for the liberation of Banderastan from its US/Nazi/oligarchic occupiers.  If that happens and if a new Ukraine eventually emerges, then I have no doubt that the people of the Ukraine will agree that each region should have the right of self-determination ranging from cultural right to full separation.  Only then will we really find out which regions want to stay and which ones want to leave forever.

In the meantime, I am very positively impressed by the Novorussian field commanders.  Bezler and Mozgovoi of course, but also Givi, Motorola, Zakharchenko, Kononov  and the others are all strong figures capable of both fighting and talking.  Strelkov, alas, is still more or less in political no man’s land and I am very concerned about his proximity with the blogger el-Murid who is clearly a “gateway” to the “hurray-patriots” and “Putin bashers” which are being used by the Empire to try to discredit Putin. Still, the political infighting amongst Novorussian leaders continues and there is still no clear leader.  Hopefully, the upcoming elections will help to solve this issue.

#     #     #

THE HIDDEN HISTORY CENTER Now Established

John Judge, who recently passed away, was a log-time activist and co-founder of the Coalition on Political Assassinations (COPA). “At the time of his death, John was working on creation of a Hidden History Museum and Research Center in Washington, DC, to educate a new generation about covert operations, and to support the work of investigative journalists and researchers looking into the National Security State and the rise of secrecy, government plans for extra-Constitutional jurisdiction during emergencies, and threats to civil liberties and international relations. Some of his writings can be found at judgeforyourself.org.””

A recent message from Marilyn Tenenoff reports that the Hidden history Center has now been established. Here is Marilyn’s message:

THE HIDDEN HISTORY CENTER IS BORN!

I’m excited to announce that this weekend we will begin moving the John Judge Collection to the new Hidden History Center on the upper level of 105 Rowell Court in Falls Church, VA.  It is a wonderful brightly-lit space (over 1,000 square feet) in an attractive professional center called Old Brickhouse Square, located right on Route 7.

The i’s are dotted and the t’s are crossed, and the lease will be officially signed on Friday.

If you can lift boxes, we could use your help at John’s house on Saturday, October 11, between 11 AM and 3 PM.  We need to move about 100 boxes down one level, and to make a pathway in the basement, so egress will be easier for the movers.

There are still more boxes to pack, so we’d be glad to have your help, even if you can’t lift.

On Sunday, we have a team of movers coming to transport the first 450 boxes to our new location.  I believe that represents about 2/3 of John’s collection.  We probably still have another 100-150 boxes to pack.

After the collection is packed and moved, we will begin working on John’s personal belongings.  Please let me know if there is anything that belonged to him that you would like to have as a memento of your friendship with him.

If you are looking for end-of-the-year tax deductions, we can still use contributions to this project.  Make checks payable to Museum of Hidden History, which is a 501(c)(3) non-profit.  Send them to P.O. Box 772, Washington, DC, 20044.  Or donate through PayPal on our website, http://museumofhiddenhistory.org/.

Thanks so much to all of you for helping to make John’s dream come true!  The work is just beginning!

Love ~ Marilyn

#     #     #