Some Sage Advice from Will Rogers

Here’s some folk wisdom and good advice from the great American humorist and social commentator Will Rogers

1. Never slap a man who’s chewing tobacco.

2. Never kick a cow chip on a hot day.

3. There are 2 theories to arguing with a woman…neither works.

4. Never miss a good chance to shut up.

5. Always drink upstream from the herd.

6. If you find yourself in a hole, stop digging.

7. The quickest way to double your money is to fold it and put it back in your pocket.

8. There are three kinds of men: The ones that learn by reading. The few who learn by observation. The rest of them have to pee on the electric fence and find out for themselves.

9. Good judgment comes from experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.

10. If you’re riding’ ahead of the herd, take a look back every now and then to make sure it’s still there.

11. Lettin’ the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier’n puttin’ it back.

12. After eating an entire bull, a mountain lion felt so good he started roaring. He kept it up until a hunter came along and shot him.
The moral: When you’re full of bull, keep your mouth shut.

Happy Birthday Julie – You’re a Fine Old Gal.

The following was contained in an email I received recently from a friend. I presume it actually happened.

Julie Andrews’ lyrics are clever and cute, and good for a few chuckles, but not the kind of seeds I want to plant in my brain. Is that denial?

I don’t believe that getting old NECESSARILY means getting decrepit.

The old body, like the old car, if properly taken care of, can serve very well until one decides to either junk it or let it become a museum piece. Enjoy. – t.h.g.

Julie Andrews Turns 69

To commemorate her birthday, actress/vocalist, Julie Andrews made a special appearance at
Manhattan ‘s Radio City Music Hall for the benefit of the AARP. One of the musical numbers she performed was ‘My Favorite Things’  from the legendary movie ‘Sound Of Music’.   Here are the lyrics she used:

Maalox and nose drops and needles for knitting,
Walkers and  handrails and new dental fittings,
Bundles of magazines tied up in string,
These are a few of my favorite things.

Cadillacs and cataracts, and hearing aids and glasses,
Polident and Fixodent and false teeth in glasses,
Pacemakers, golf carts and porches with swings,
These are a few of my favorite things.

When the pipes leak, When the bones creak,
When the knees go bad,
I simply remember my favorite things,
And then I don’t feel so bad.

Hot tea and crumpets and corn pads for bunions,
No spicy hot food or food cooked with onions,

Bathrobes and heating pads and hot meals they bring,
These are a few of my favorite things.

Back pain, confused brains and no need for sinnin’,
Thin bones and fractures and hair that is thinnin’,
And we won’t mention our short shrunken frames,
When we remember our favorite things.

When the joints ache, When the hips break,
When the eyes grow dim,
Then I remember the great life I’ve had,
And then I don’t feel so bad.

****************************************

Ms. Andrews received a standing ovation from the crowd that lasted over four minutes and repeated encores.

New Scientist Reports That “Cheap, ‘safe’ Drug Kills Most Cancers”

An article that appeared in the 20 January 2007 issue of New Scientist describes “a cheap and simple drug that kills almost all cancers by switching off their “immortality”. The drug, dichloroacetate (DCA), has already been used for years to treat rare metabolic disorders and so is known to be relatively safe. It also has no patent, meaning it could be manufactured for a fraction of the cost of newly developed drugs.” Research on this is ongoing at the University of Alberta (Canada).